Wonderfilled

I love songs that are just ridiculous and life loving.  I wish I had an oreo to give...*sniff*...
I have been listening to this song for what I literally think is a million times in a row.  And I still can't stop listening to it.

Kazi ni Naru

...this isn't right... why am I doing this?... I feel like I'm assimilating into someone else... :)... anyway, I just found it on that recommendation think on youtube and I liked it.  I think this movie's pretty cute.  I like it. 
Oh my gosh this is freaking me out EWWW!!!!

What extists?

What things is already there is never there.  I'd like to make a note on judgement.  People sometimes feel that they must wear what everyone wears and enjoy and do what everyone else does.  And greatest of them all, they feel too self conscious about themselves.  Now honestly, would you think that if you knew that nearly everyone around feels the same away about themselves?  You see what I mean?  They're really is no judgement. Only self-consciousness.  And now you wonder, where did these trends and fashions come from?  I'll tell you where they came from: individuals.  Individuals are those who don't follow the trends of everyone else, they make them.  They don't care what anyone else thinks, they're perfectly satisfied with what they've got.  Even poor and impoverish people are individuals and start trends.  Those whom we remember the most.  Those people are individuals.  And if individuals don't make new trends, then what?  Well, they think, "who cares. At least I'm not being copied now."
Go, be individuals.  Do what you want.  It's okay to do what everyone else is doing of course, but only if you want to do it, and you don't feel pressured to do it.  Don't just do things to make a statement, it doesn't make you any better.  Gosh dang it, just be yourself.  What's so hard about that?  Just do what you want and you'll be fine.
Oh, but don't forget to do things that scare you.  That's what helps to make who you are.  So go out, talk to a stranger, say hi to that old man who gives you the chills.  learn to drive.  Just do it...
"--okay, Alyse get down from your soap box, we're trying to sleep!"

"...sorry..."

*Learning about individuality isn't what monsters always need...*

The Strange Beast: Future

I think the most strangest and mysterious creature in the whole world is Future.  You don't know what he looks like.  In fact, you never really know what he looks like.  He sits in darkness, stalking you, smiling at you with a smile you can't figure out.  Future doesn't attack with his teeth and claws or sits on you with his grotesque mass.  He attacks your senses, your mind, your emotional discipline.  He just sits there, watching you.  You know he's there, but you never know if he's going to pounce at you or when.  You think about him all the time, wondering what it will be like when you meet him.  Will he be kind or cruel.  And then, before you know it, the thing you've been scared of has already passed.  But he's still there.  Stalking you.  And still you get nervous.  Always watching your back.  You can never seem to run from him if you try and yet he never really touches you at all.  Strange.  I've known some monsters to be strange, like selfs, prejudice, and loneliness, but never is a creature so strange as Future himself.  You never see him, yet you know he's there.  He never harms you, but your anxious for when he strikes.

Speaking of the creature Loneliness (tangent :D).  Loneliness is an odd creature.  When you're by yourself, he comes to you and comforts you.  But see that's what he intends.  He lets you know he's there and for some reason you panic.  It's weird, because he's so nice to you.  he tells you that there's no one else around but you and him.  It's good to have at least someone isn't it?  Then he's really nice enough to give you a name: Alone.  We all accept that name because we cry "I'm alone!" but it's never in a jubilant way.  He talks to you telepathically all the time, always using the name he gave you, but we never talk back.  I wonder if he likes it or not, when you ignore him as if he's not there.  You get so self-centered.  Loneliness has needs too.  Why don't you fill them.  I think he just wants a friend, but we're never really willing enough to be that.  Monsters are very strange creatures.

...I wish I were one...

Tangent # 2:  Have you ever noticed that I particularly like monsters?  Like, I think about them all the time?  I've just barely noticed...hmm...why did it take me so long to figure out?  Maybe I am a monster and I just don't know about it...

Tangent #3:  I also noticed just barely that really like ellipses...why is that?  Is it because I like the awkwardness of it all?

Tangent #4:  I WANT TO BE A MONSTER!!!

From Finner

hmm...I wouldn't mind living on the back of a sea monster.  I think I could get used to the rickety house and repair the walls when I needed to.  It's better than a house that does nothing at all.  Old houses have character I think.  The older they get, the more it seems to develop of personality.  I don't want a new house when I grow up.  I want an old one.  Anyway, this is something I've wanted to draw for a long time.  I heard this song, and I guess this is just what I thought of.  It fits really.

From Finner
By Of Monsters and Men (I know, I bet you're really annoyed by them now)

A Bird Cage and my Heart

I have a thing or two to tell

About a heart that goes amiss.

Now you may have heard

Of stories of hearts and empty rib cages;

Of men who gave them freely,

Or stowed them away for safe keeping.

You may have heard of that old tin man

Who all he never had was a beating little heart.

But those men are foolish

And careless in way.

Why, with a soul like that,

Any heart wouldn't stay.

And what does that metal man think

That he's miserable with no heart.

Well he's never had a heart to begin with;

How should he know?

Well I've got a tale

Of a cage without a heart.

It all begins with me,

And the tale of my heart.

You see had a heart,

Very lovely and fair.

I loved it terribly much

And it, I assumed the same

  But unfortunately it wasn't so,

For it had found it dreary;

Too lonely in its cage.

And so upon one day

When I was out and about,

It twiddle and fiddled

With the link upon the cage.

Finding it a bit bizarre

To see my heart behave this way,

I foolishly opened me up

To ask what of the matter.

With fortune of opportunity

My dearest heart took flight.

 And off away he went 

Without me to depart.

I ran so hard and as swift as I could

But one without a heart

Loses hope to run so far.

And so away it went

Forever from my cage

There's nothing more unnerving

Than to lose what gave you love.

And so when you cross by

That guffy man and rusty man,

Remember how ungrateful

Those foolish men have been

For I loved mine just so

As any girl would do.

But none could feel such greif

than one who's heart flew and left.

Manga drawing book = :D

Got a manga drawing book....I'm happy.